After shifting through almost three cities in the last one year, I'm back to parents home and this time with the closest I can get to a real job. But, that's probably the only half-decent thing that happened to me 2013, which could otherwise be known as THE.WORST.YEAR.EVER. (TWYE - WTF) Okay, Gods up in the clouds (who give rains in winter) don't give me all that evil smile and say your life's just started. I've heard enough of that crap from all the 25 year old's in my life.
Now, that it's December, the joy of who's arrival seems like I've overcome an apocalypse, I really need to have an update of what made 2013- WTF. What better place than a blog entry on a blog that I frequented less than four times this year, Yeah! it's coz of the bad year and being caught on a job that required me to write about Hindi television serials. #killer
It started off pretty well, with a trip to Kolli Hills which was everything but boring. So, after an amazing (where my lungs got cleared - pollution free air and all) trip and an almost great January, we move to Feb, about which I don't remember much. For starters, I had pretty lousy December 31, 2012 as against an amazing 2011 December (Also, New Year's eve) . And that's when you get to know about how your year would turnout. It's important to have a good start, more for psychological, mind pleasing reasons than anything else.
March 2013 - a game changer in so many ways. A month where I realised I'm not as strong as it seemed, I can't stand up for myself when people are screaming at me and I take blames even if I wasn't responsible for any. A month where, I-am-a-mature-person and have an high self-esteem got crumpled. What I dint know then was, in the next few months as I'm helped by someone to get over it, I would fall in the same pit again. And this time the blow would be mind-numbing. So, after a 3 am scream fight that blew my confidence away and that involved calling names, I retracted into a cocoon.
Since March almost killed my spirits, April, the most crucial month of the year considering the placements were around the corner, made things worse after I failed to land a job due to favouritism politics in college (I'm not playing the blame game, oh common I knew people who hadn't completed half of their placement tests get jobs). Also, more on that would follow soon.
May was damp except for a new entrant in life who promised to stick along forever and almost got me out of depression before pushing me down the drain.
June was great, after I landed a lousy job in BOMBAY. Yeah! only Bombay mattered to me at that point. So, after 3 amazing months at grandmom's house and making a happy set of friends things started to look up.
And then September showed up and things were never the same again.
The ego is a fascinating monster.
Alanis Morissette
Now, that it's December, the joy of who's arrival seems like I've overcome an apocalypse, I really need to have an update of what made 2013- WTF. What better place than a blog entry on a blog that I frequented less than four times this year, Yeah! it's coz of the bad year and being caught on a job that required me to write about Hindi television serials. #killer
It started off pretty well, with a trip to Kolli Hills which was everything but boring. So, after an amazing (where my lungs got cleared - pollution free air and all) trip and an almost great January, we move to Feb, about which I don't remember much. For starters, I had pretty lousy December 31, 2012 as against an amazing 2011 December (Also, New Year's eve) . And that's when you get to know about how your year would turnout. It's important to have a good start, more for psychological, mind pleasing reasons than anything else.
March 2013 - a game changer in so many ways. A month where I realised I'm not as strong as it seemed, I can't stand up for myself when people are screaming at me and I take blames even if I wasn't responsible for any. A month where, I-am-a-mature-person and have an high self-esteem got crumpled. What I dint know then was, in the next few months as I'm helped by someone to get over it, I would fall in the same pit again. And this time the blow would be mind-numbing. So, after a 3 am scream fight that blew my confidence away and that involved calling names, I retracted into a cocoon.
Since March almost killed my spirits, April, the most crucial month of the year considering the placements were around the corner, made things worse after I failed to land a job due to favouritism politics in college (I'm not playing the blame game, oh common I knew people who hadn't completed half of their placement tests get jobs). Also, more on that would follow soon.
May was damp except for a new entrant in life who promised to stick along forever and almost got me out of depression before pushing me down the drain.
June was great, after I landed a lousy job in BOMBAY. Yeah! only Bombay mattered to me at that point. So, after 3 amazing months at grandmom's house and making a happy set of friends things started to look up.
And then September showed up and things were never the same again.
The ego is a fascinating monster.
Alanis Morissette
And a man's boosted ego is probably the biggest monster a person would ever endure. Because he's an animal at that point and does not realise that he's crumbling way too many things in a bid to establish his superiority.
So, this man got offended coz I called him a dog and would go on to call me names and threaten to destroy me if I would ever try to say anything that he ever told me. It was not devastating at all coz exactly 7 months back I went through a similar thing. This time I knew how to handle it (considering it involved a chauvinistic male) just that a little something in me had broken. My trust was in shambles and I still have no idea how to resurrect it.
After a never ending October and a happier November ( I landed an awesome job), its almost the end of the year.
Coming to think of it, WTF doesn't seem that bad on paper, but given my history of almost never facing such adversities, it's been quite a roller coaster ride.
I've learnt to stand for myself and never to trust a fellow human being. With a baggage of failed relationships and a love life that went horribly wrong, I sincerely hope to have an awesome New Year's eve.
2014 - Bring it on. Whatever you have in store, would be made doubly awesome with my rekindled never-give-up spirit.
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