Unstrewn random thoughts.

I made promises and broke them.

I said I'll never disturb and ended up doing that all the time.

I said I understood the situation. In reality I understood nothing.

I was expecting something out of everything.

I was trying to impress and ended up depressing everybody.

I through tantrums time and again.

I shared everything. I assumed too many things.

I pined to talk. And ended up being a satellite.

I might probably be at fault.

Or this might be just another passing phase.

 I can't just say anything at this juncture.

Every word I speak is hitting the wrong chord.


The journey is hard. And it goes on.

This might be just another write up.

But, who knows the truth? Who can read your mind?

I Go On.

Don't crib. Accept things. Move on.

I am at a place where there is ten hours of official power cut daily. About 15 days back, I was cribbing for a two hour power cut. Not that I am effected by any of these ( thanks to Michael Faraday ). But its insane that we realize the worth of what we have only after experiencing/ seeing what others don't have.

Everything runs on comparison. Its good, as far as the comparison is healthy and we learn from it. But, the problem starts when we don't do that. We see the dark side of it and create a chaos. And then we crib. 

On my self discovering journey, I tried figuring out things, that could possibly hinder growth of an individual and eventually the nation as a whole. And the answers I got are pretty simple but working on them would be a task. Nevertheless, it would only benefit us if we can inculcate a little of them slowly in our way of thinking.

Here they go, 
 
Cribbing is the biggest problem.

There's power shortage -- we crib
Somebody doesn't meet our expectations-- we crib
There's water stoppage for a few hours -- we crib
No auto/ bus-- We crib
If its hot/ cold/ rainy/ pleasant -- we crib

In short we crib for anything and everything. In fact we have taken it as our birth right. We would soon have RTC  ( Right to Crib ) act just like RTE and RTI. And then we would have bifurcations about who can crib how much and who have little less privilege to crib and so on...


We always crib with a whine and we don't stop it for a long time. Apart from wasting a lot of time, we also waste considerable amount of energy. Not that we could have done something that would have questioned the very existence of the working of human brain. But, not cribbing and accepting things would fasten up things. And also give some fodder to the brain, making use of it for better purposes than cribbing.

Half  the problems of the world could be solved if only we could stop cribbing and start moving.

The second big problem - Acceptance.

Why is acceptance a problem? Why can't we just say okay, this is how it is going to be and get on with our lives. Its simple, instead of debating about a problem we can always accept the problem and do something to solve it. If not solving it at least find an alternative to it so that it doesn't come in our way of things. Like for power cuts, we know nothing can be done to them other than fixing a generator or UPS. But, not everybody can own one. Instead of cribbing we can accept the fact and strategically plan out things.

A recent newspaper article highlighted the brighter side of power cuts. Read on. 


Making issue out of everything is the sole purpose of our existence.

The issue making business starts from small things and then goes on to larger unimportant stuff. For instance, India losing a cricket match is the biggest news on television. The issue is blown so much out of proportion that one feels as if we lost a war and now destruction of the country is inevitable. And then we of course have other important issues that needs to be discussed, like wardrobe malfunction, who's wearing what in who's party and why etc...

I am not opposing them, I am just trying to figure out why is it given so much of importance? A television channel should be a blend of every news, highlighting the important ones ( news that affects the nation as a whole ).

Cribbing eventually leads to making an issue of unimportant things. Its good to make an issue of things that affects the nation and needs to be addressed with immediate action. For instance, corruption, illegal stuff, murders, rapes, health hazards, inflation etc... have to be made an issue of to tackle them effectively and create an awareness. The rest can just be news that provides information.

Its about time we accept things and settle down. We cannot crib for everything. We either have to accept it or do something to change it.

Cribbing is not the solution to any problem. Accepting and moving on will help us in tackling problems if not offering a solution to it.


Time to start working. :)

Blogging on the move.

I am blogging from the train and from my BRAND NEW LAPTOP. Ahh! It feels so good to own one. 
This is the first time I am traveling alone. Its nice to be alone and try to figure out things by your own.

Independence in every way. :)

The train journey has been good so far, if the initial goof ups are not considered. I got into a different compartment and walked my way to the other end of the train through the connecting plates. All I can say is, this is only the beginning of my self discovering journey- SDJ  ( I am going alone to a serene place, has to be SDJ ). Apart from that, one of the co- Passenger's is playing Rockstar in my compartment. Couldn't have asked for a better-first-time-all-alone-train-journey.

I am already feeling the I am going to Tamil Nadu pangs, considering the fact that there are so many veshti mama's* and mookuthi mami's*. Identifying a tamilian is easy, believe me on that. Our looks are not deceptive. We are easy on eyes.

On the journey, hope I get answers for some unanswered questions. Its the need of the hour. 

On other random stuff,

I saw 3 ( the kolaveri movie ) with an old friend. And WOW! I loved the movie. Dhanush, I am your fan and Shruthi looks BEAUTIFUL. The concept is neat and the twist blew me away. On the flip side, it drags in parts.




* Veshti- A 5 meter long white cloth that is draped from the hip by men ( Man's version of drape on skirt ).
* Mookuti- A piece of jewellery worn on the nose after it is pierced. Mostly it is diamond studded.
* Mama/ Mami- Indian translation for Uncle/Aunt.

Freshly unemployed update

I am Jobless. I have an exam in May but I cannot get enough of my bed. My laziness has touched an all time high and the soaring temperatures aren't helping much ( Its just March, Sun..take rest..cool off for a while. you'll have to burn so much more in May).

At times idleness sets in and gives laziness some complex, competition you see. An offspring of idleness, is screwing everything which is going just about fine. I have a PhD in screwing up things, Dr. Divya, PhD in screwing and re screwing already screwed screws (pure talent).

In brief, this is what I do/did:

I always have an idea of how things should go and when it doesn't, I do my best to make it go the way I it want to. So, when something wasn't going my way I tried messing things up. Thus, screwing people and hurting them. The worse part was, this time the magnitude of hurt was BIG. And I am shameful for the highly stupefied no brainier act that I did.

Consequences: lots of tears, innumerable 'sorry' messages, making up and making a promise ( I know its serious this time, so I dare not break it or else I am DEAD). 

Result:  I'm forgiven for the brainless blunder. *Wide Gratitude Grin* .    

Lesson: Let time take its course. Everything has a time and running against it would only add up to the already messed mess . So, let things be and go with the flow. And do not hold on to things. Live the moment and make it a memory, not a way of living.

I'm also hoping to get into my dream college, in spite of all the laziness, idleness and screwing up. Now, that's what you call dreaming ( only ) with eyes wide open.

Okay, I'm studying from today.

Apart from that I am eating a lot and piling on some baby fat ( Its just been 7629 days since I was born ).

So, after having such eventful freshly unemployed days, its time to pack bags and move. Not holiday. Its business ( read: desperate attempts to 'study') this time.

Random stuff, I got a new phone. Finally, an ANDROID. And I'm loving it.

     

Namma Chennai...it is!

My first out station audit came after I put down my papers. And, It was Chennai. They had their reasons in place for sending me there. Still, it was Chennai.

OK, Chennai was never one of my favourite places. To start with, I had quite a few unpleasant experiences over the years. I was never a frequent visitor but then I dint complain. Chennai never felt home.

Perceptions Change. Yes, three days stay in Chennai changed my view about it ( little more than partially ).
The best thing about the city is its traffic. The most well organised I have seen in a long time. Atleast, when you compare it to the ruthless traffic of Hyderabad, Chennai seems heavenly. The food ( Read: Saravana Bhavan ) is freaking awesome.


The breeze at the beach is soothing. It takes you to a different world. And of course no language barrier just adds to the fun.

There is more to Chennai, I know. But, I am the queen of laziness.

I could only go to the beaches as I chose to stay abode on Sunday because it was HOT outside.

The work was pretty chilled out. Again, No language barrier helped.

I did learn something about me , never have pre-conceived notions about anything. Often, I tend to take on somebody else's thought and form my opinion/notions based on it. That only lead to a narrowed life. What I realised is, the more you are open, the more you enjoy. Its simple, go with the flow and form opinions based on what you see and not what you hear/ made to hear.   

NOW,

To whoever started Saravana Bhavan,

Please open a branch in Hyderabad. your bank balance would double up. If it doesn't, You can anyways cover up for your losses considering the number of successful branches you have across the world. Give it a thought. Hyderabadis are foodies.

 So, Namma* Chennai it is. ! ( My Dad is Super Happy about the development) :D

* Translates into Our Chennai.

All Play No Love

Just when you start thinking,  life's Awesome... BANG! It says Not Yet!

Its been a fairly exhaustive and fun in parts month.

Exhaustive only work wise. :P

Yes, Its been a month since I blogged. All of last month went in coming to terms with some facts which shook me up. I’m still trying to understand somethings that is going above my head ( literal translation of ‘ sir ke upar se jaa raha hai ). Hoping for things to ease out.

I know February is the month of love. But, my life certainly is devoid of that particular form of love ( from a recipients point of view ). So, when everybody was talking about valentines day and how their beau ( grr!) surprised them with unexpected gifts, I was practising the art of ignorance.

The first chunk of the month went in practising ignorance and planning for a surprise.

Putting together things for a surprise is like getting dressed for a party. After everything is set you realise, this was nothing close to what you imagined it to be. And you cant do much about it, because its time already. All you can do is put a cute smile on your face and say surprise. Of course the mushy mushy lines included. And then the person is all floored and flattered. End of the story. ( Read: the first para again. )

What matters is if the person has got the feeling right. If no, HARD LUCK! But then, miracles happen they say. So, wait. Somebody ( might be the same person ;) ) , someday might sweep you off your feet as well. And there's nothing wrong in expecting a little kindness and care from people. Its what you ought to get. Now, to all those who say expectation kills. Its not expectation that kills, its how much and what you expect that kills. Somethings are requirements for sustainability of any relationship, terming them as expectations is cowardness.    

The good part of the month was the off site trip to vizag. It was fun in true, unadulterated definition. And my team was declared the winner in the activities conducted. Ah! felt awesome. ( Yes, I live life in all these small victories). It was a grand farewell, INDEED.

The games played in the train, running between 3 compartments, talking all through the night, checking into Novotel and being in awe with the sea view from the room, winning activities/ games with as much enthusiasm as a school kid, fighting for points, dancing like crazy, singing like professionals in karaoke and living each moment.

Now, that's exactly how an extended weekend and paid holiday should be like.

The month was actually good. It did help me in understand somethings and of course complicate some stuffs as well. But, over all it made me smile ( the cute one).

Realisation: 1.5 months down...15 days to go. :)

Count down Begins.!

My First Hero.

The day I came, you smiled and shed a tear because your happiness knew no bounds.

Your hands shivered as you clicked my first steps. You were jubilant.

Your joy touched heights the day I said 'pa'.

You made sure I had enough toys to play to my hearts content.

You made all ends meet, just to make sure I get into the best school.

You Held my hands on the first day of school, just to assure me that I am not alone.

You sat with me and completed my home works, so that i don't get scolded at school.

You hit me hard, the day you came to know I made a mistake. So that I don't repeat them.

You sat there in the crowd beaming when I won the prizes.

You couldn't stop gushing about me to everybody the day I came on TV.

You were disheartened with my performance in boards but never let it pass on to me just to make sure that my confidence is not lowered.

You were ecstatic the day I cleared my 12th with great marks and got into the city's best college.

Your pride touched new heights the day I got placed.

I remember you telling me that, Change is the only thing constant.
Any amount of changes would only make my respect and love deeper for you.

A few years down the line, life would change a bit with some new entrants.

Still,

You would always remain the first man in my life.

You would always be the only man I could trust blindly upon.

You would always be my First Hero whom I have been and would look upto in every situation.

I would always be your little daughter.

Happy Birthday Daddy...All I hope for is that you celebrate 100 such birthdays and all your wishes are fulfilled.